Mirror, Mirror Syndrome: The Power of Reflection
When I was a little girl I used to play “Snow White” and gaze into the mirror asking the question “Mirror, mirror who is the fairest of them all?”
Of course, I fully expected the mirror to tell me it was ME! Why wouldn’t it – the mirror never lies. That was the selling point of the fixture – it always told the truth.
As an adult, having the mirror of truth cast in front of you is a bit different. We look for the truth but sometimes are not comfortable with it. Often times when we’re struggling with someone else’s behavior or actions it’s a signal we may actually be exhibiting the same or similar behaviors.
“Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, Who is the most insecure of all?”
“Well” the mirror responds hesitantly “You Are My Dear”
“Me?” you respond in shock, clutching your pearls in dramatic fashion
“But I’m just sensitive, I’m not like Sally who is just so high maintenance & needy! Lord only knows why anyone would want to work with her!”
The mirror laughs “Are you sure about that? You might want to look a little bit deeper.”
You could replace “insecure” with just about anything: stingy with money, withholding, manipulative, scared, ruthless, unfeeling, selfish etc. However the premise is the same. When you find yourself in a situation where someone or something is just twisting you into knots it usually means a mirror is being held up for you to look at your own behavior patterns. Most often they are sabotaging patterns you use yourself.
Do you have trouble with flaky clients/staff/vendors or even friends? Well that could mean you’re being flaky as well. I can hear your jaw dropping in utter denial. So I ask you: Do you make those follow up phone calls to other clients when you said you would? Do you show up on time to events or other appointments? Do you ditch plans with friends or family at the last moment…often? Are you reliable? Really, truly….are you reliable?
The importance of understanding the MIRROR MIRROR SYNDROME is 3-fold.
a) Double Minded Drama – The conflict or agitation arises from a double minded dynamic that’s occurring inside: Ego on one side – the source of much negativity, fear, loss, perception of scarcity etc. On the other side is your true spirit self – kind, loving, patient & compassionate. Clearly, they are diametrically opposed in nature. This clash is what produces unnecessary drama; feelings of resentment, anger or annoyance with another person that can play out in a variety of ways.
b) Listening to Your Guidance – The degree or intensity of what you’re feeling about the person in question has only to do with your internal guidance system, your intuition, nudging you. Usually the bigger the issue the harder the nudge.
c) Opportunity for Growth – The Power of Reflection is your intuition knocking at the door saying “hello wake up, you need to correct this and get back on track.” The mirror is being held up and you can then address the situation.
In learning to evaluate these reflections you have the opportunity to learn about the things that may be limiting your success & sabotaging your own efforts. The intention of the Universe is for you to have a peaceful existence. Contrary to machinations of others who can spin conflict to their own benefit, a peaceful life is always the better gift.
As Dr. Wayne Dyer says “ Conflict cannot survive without your participation”. If you like the drama and conflict, keep it. That’s fine. If not, then it’s time to recognize changes you might need to make and take action.
Remember, you have the power to decide how this will play out. It’s all about CHOICE!
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