WHEN LOVE IS LOST! Love-a-licious! Part II [Relationships] [Dating]

By on June 15, 2011

WHEN LOVE IS LOST! Part II Bella Petite proudly presents newly contributing writer Candace Chambers-Belida on Dating and Relationships!

Now please understand, we all want to have a perfect relationship that has eternal bliss and longevity, but nothing this wonderful ever comes easy. Both parties must work at it with due diligence. This is a work that never ends, but is to be continuous, to maintain the success of the relationship.

Sometimes the occasional sorry not tonight dear, I have a head ache, is an action that leads to not only to the valley of temptation but to the arms of the other woman, or other man. Retreating from your spouse or significant other is treading on dangerous waters, despite the fact that you may feel that you need space. Consider this, how can you expect to keep a relationship burning with passion and desire, if you keep dousing the relationship with waters of rejection or unavailability?

The unfortunate problem in relationships is that some have taken their vows of commitment and love, and feel that there is nothing more needed or necessary for them to do to enhance the relationship. I’ve once heard a man say “I’ve married her- what more does she what from me?” To some they feel that because they have signed the dotted line on the marriage license, their ultimate marital duties are done, when in reality, they’ve just begun.

In order to have a beautiful relationship, it takes trust, and the obvious is love and time. But more importantly it takes two people wanting to be together and also wanting to continue to exchange this desire and love between themselves. Love is a choice. It’s not a forced action that anyone should feel that they must do, but by free will and volition, you are in the relationship simply because you chose to be so. Unfortunately desires and passions of the heart or at risk of changing, flutter and faltering with time.

Love is a risk and the heart is vulnerable when one opens the doors to love. There is absolutely no guarantee that the one you love, is going to love you back, or let alone love you for eternity. But because the benefits of love are so great, we all have reckless abandon, and can only wish that truly we have landed the desire of our dreams and with that come the seal of a covenant heart and faithfulness. We want this type of love to last forever, but this is subject to change for some. If one’s heart has departed from the relationship and has become cold, no amount of counseling can cause the relationship to be restored.

Love is a gift that two people give each other freely. So, the most courageous thing a person who falls out of love can do is to let the other person know, instead of causing further sorrow upon sorrow, by trying to keep the best of both worlds’ hidden under the cloak of secrecy. There is no easy way to say good-bye, and yes it does cause great pain, but it’s better than reading it in tomorrow’s paper.

Written by: Candace Chambers-Belida

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